I woke up feeling extraordinarily depressed this morning.
I spent the whole day feeling like a zombie...
I'll be back to livejournal when I feel like I can smile, or even open my eyes all the way.

Sorry for being so moody all the time.

I think I'll just do random updates everyday...just so I don't disappear. lol?
Tomorrow is Veteran's day! No school!
Yay! So I can leisurely work on my Basic Design project and just enjoy it.

Registered for classes today...

Monday Wednesday Friday: 9-10:50 Basic Design 2

Monday Wednesday: 6:30pm -9:20pm Life Drawing (which means I get to draw naked people! fun! *rolls eyes*)

Tuesday Thursday: 9:30-10:45 World Music (wonder if we'll learn about Marwan? XD or Moein? or Dariush? XDDD)
11-12:15 Speech
12:30-1:45 Renaissance to Modern Art History
6:30 pm - 9:20 pm Painting

^.^
Tuesdays and Thursdays will be hella long. I mean...yeah. Just long. And I'm not looking forward to having night classes 4 days a week. I will be EXHAUSTED!

In other news...

( Depressing stuff under cut. )

I just got home from the hospital.

Those were the worst 4 days of my life...I was constanly getting blood drawn, I got fluid drawn from my spine, I got a shot in my tummy, I had needles stuck into my legs and electric shocks sent through them, I was woken up every 2 hours to get my vitals checked...it was hell.

Turns out though, I'm going to be okay.
I had a mild form of this neurological virus that actually could have left me paralyzed and/or...could have killed me.

How scary is that?
To think: "hey Heather, if you close your eyes and fall asleep--your body will attack itself and you won't wake up!"

It was scary and it was hell.

But I'm stronger than that...I guess.

I think I lost my cool and freaked out when my mom called my dad Thursday morning, while I was waiting for the hospital to get my room ready...and she started crying.

I'm such a wimp...but I am so glad it's all over.

 

I still have tingling sensations in parts of my body...but at least I know, this is just recovery. I'm not at a risk for dying anymore.
Isn't that wonderful?

I think so. ^.^

So...what did I do when I got home?
Took McDonald's to-go...and watched America's Next Top Model. ^.^
Feels good to be home...I just can't wait to sleep undisturbed in my bed tonight!

Please pray for me...>.>

Yesterday, I woke up, my legs were tingling, I had no balance and couldn't walk straight.
Last night, my head was spinning, I couldn't see, couldn't sit up. My mom had to basically carry me to bed...and I went to bed at 7:30pm!
This morning, I woke up feeling the same as yesterday morning, so I went to the doctor...and after I told them everything, she was extremely worried.

Last time I blogged, I was complaining of being sick with a fever. It wasn't swine flu, but my doctor things that's what's causing my problems. She says I may have a neurological virus, and those can happen 1-4 weeks after getting sick, and basically...

I'm going to the hospital in an hour--they have a room for me and everything.


Okay, basically...I'm a wimp.
I have panic attacks--I worry over everything.

So needless to say, I am very VERY scared right now (I mean...they're going to stick a needle in my spine!).

Please pray for me...I really want to be okay.
I'm sure with whatever's wrong with me, they can fix me...but I'm still scared.

I'm out of ideas for my drawing assignment...I just need to keep in mind that...sometimes less is more. I shouldn't focus on making it to crowded...no one else is...*sigh*

I'm in a creative funk right now...I should be sketching something--making use of my time...>.>
Sketching ANYTHING.
Sketch...sketch...huh.

I just LOVE drawing but I HATE being told WHEN to draw!! XDDDD
It's hard...but the worst part is: I can't draw in front of people so I always waste 3 hours in class, lol.
>>>>>I suck<<<<<<

...I'm tired...

My routine is that I like to come home, respond to all comments, comments on all new blogs, and then write one myself...but today...I need to vent first.

I am exhausted first of all. Absolutely exhausted. I get 4 hours of sleep a night because I go to bed at midnight, but at 4 in the morning...the dumbasses at Scott AFB decide it's time to practice at the firing range! There is nothing worse than waking up by a gun shot and then hearing it non-stop for 3 hours...because they stop at 7...which is the time I wake up anyway.

I'm the only one who wakes up because I'm a light sleeper.

Who did I make cry?
My sister.
And I frankly don't give a damn.

( Rant rant rant )
...this is just going to be a crappy weekend if it's a repeat of last weekend...not looking forward to getting ANOTHER silent treatment from her. >.>...i'm cranky.

How does she do it?
XDD

Ha...I'm trying.

Today was interesting...my Basic Design teacher called me to his office and said: "I can tell you're going to be very successful."
We talked about what I wanted to do, and which university I wanted to transfer to (SIUE)...but he said going there would be a waste for me. Their art program is great for PAINTERS, DRAWERS, and SCULPTERS...but I wouldn't get much for my money in the GRAPHIC DESIGN field.

So he told me to think about going to UMSL.
It's basically the same price as SIUE...and because I'm in St. Clair county, UMSL has a little program where I can pay in-state tuition.

I looked at the campus...it is GORGEOUS!

But the best part?

If I went to SIUE...I'd have to take a 45 minute drive to get there. That's fine...but if I have to wake up at 5am...leave at 6am...get there by 7am...stay into school until 3-4pm, get home at 5-6pm...that's a hell-of-a-long day. And in the winter time? I'd have to fight with traffic AND bad weather!

BUT...if I went to UMSL...I drive 10 minutes to SWIC (my college now)...park at the metro-station there...get on the metro...45 minutes later...I'm there.

UMSL is the same distance as SIUE (only UMSL is in Missouri and SIUE is in Illinois)...it's just my basic every day drive.

So...90 minute drive round trip? Or 20 minute drive round trip?

I'm excited...I hope it goes as I want!
I have to find out more though...

On a side note...

( Here's the side note... )


I'm watching the finale for America's Got Talent...I hope Drew Stevyns wins! ...but I won't mind if Barabara Padilla wins. Just as long as  none of the other 8 win...^.^

Two entries TWO DAYS IN A ROW!!!

...told you I'm back. ^.^

 was going to post up pictures of my work...but we had a critique today and I got a fricken B+!

Okay...that's not bad...except every single fricken piece I've done for that class this semester and last semester has been a B+! Why the hell can't I make a fucking A? With every assignment, I try to improve and I work harder and harder (and this project took me 18 hours!) and I still can't get an A!

RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
>:-(

...ugh...so I'm not going to post any of my pictures unless it gets an A. XP <--and I'm lazzzzzzzzzzy.

The next project is an autobiographical still-life and I'm going to make it as morbid as possible. Like..."look, I'm grossly underwight, this scale reads at 89lbs." or "look, these scissors are cutting off this cute stuffed animal's head" or "look at all my black make-up" or "look at this razor blade"...evil and morbid...*sigh*

I'm NOT upset...I'm just frustrated and I'm thinking really hard about how to improve for next time. How can I do any better? I swear I keep improving...I put more and more effort into each picture...how much more effort can I put in to it? How much more time? Ugh...

^.^~I'm hungry...I'm going to work on some digital imaging homework...

I got the single most AWESOME email this evening...I was just taking a break from all my LOVELY homework, and I checked my email and...well...the single most awesome email is here:


"Hey pesarochild,

Your mutual friend zooozy has noticed that you last updated your journal on
LiveJournal 8 weeks ago!  Be a friend and go post, at http://www.livejournal.com/update.bml

Sincerely,
The LiveJournal Team"

^_____________^

Thank you zooozy!

To be perfectly honest...I hadn't realized I had been gone THAT long...>.>...I swear, I am such a nerd, I have NO social life.
But!
That is all going to change!
I swear I will comment everyone's blogs from today forward! Promise!
(and I'll update mine more...>.>))

I have been working on an art project for the past three weeks STRAIGHT. It's a mimic of the traditional Japanese Art styles...so it's VERY cool. It's due tomorrow. ^.^ It looks AMAZING. I took pictures (not very good ones) so I plan on posting them up soon.

I've been in school now for a month and I am taking FIVE art classes. *whew*
It's a lot of work!

I miss book-work! It's easier.

Also, my laptop crashed for two weeks, but my dad worked VERY hard to help me out.
It's back up and running...but my internet is acting really slow...luckily...that's not the computer's fault, now is it? ^.^

I need to go get back to my homework! I miss you all!
Take care and have a great day tomorrow!

Oh, and by the way...zooozy...I've been reading your blogs daily (when I can get on a computer) and I just have to say:

1) Don't give up on your faith.
You can give up on your religion...but don't give up on your faith.

2) Darwin doesn't disprove God. Biology doesn't. And Physics doesn't. ^.^

Okay, I'm off!